Cowboys

Well, let's just mark a "W" on the schedule and not think of this one again.

Oh wait … I'm sorry. That's what I was going to write after the Cowboys scored the game-winning touchdown last night.

Then comes another penalty. Game over. Your "best team on paper" manages to score 7 points. And even that would have been good enough for an ugly win if they hadn't given away 7 points.

I've seen more depressing losses. More dispiriting losses. More ugly losses. More deflating losses. But never a loss that managed to be all of that and more.

I've been telling Bullworker that this isn't college football. You don't have to win them all. Yes, they looked terrible in the preseason but there is time for them to get their act together. If you win enough to make the playoffs, then all you have to do is get hot at the right time (see Cardinals in Super Bowl a few years back).

But after this loss? Shit. I didn't even want to watch SportsCenter this morning. I'm not even excited about watching Monday Night Football tonight.

This was a world-class turd. I've got a few honors to go around …

Thanks, David Buehler for missing the early short-range field goal. You were the only good part of the preseason, so I'm glad you could join the rest of the team and provide the initial fuck-up that would make the rest of the game possible.

Thanks, Wade Phillips for not just having Romo take a knee and end that sorry first half. Thanks Romo for not heaving the ball down the field or just throwing it out of bounds when there was nothing to be gained.

Thanks, player personnel for getting rid of Flozell Adams, one of the most penalized players in the game, and bringing in Alex Barron, the most penalized player in the NFL. That's the Cowboys … nothing but the best.

Thanks, coaches for forcing the ball early and often to Dez Bryant, who is a rookie who hasn't been able to practice because of injury. I'm glad justifying your draft decision is more important than, say, winning games.

Thanks, Dallas Cowboys for managing to utterly deflate my excitement for the new NFL season on the first weekend. Nothing like like waiting 7 months for a happy reunion only to see the plane go up in flames as it taxis to the gate.